I was absolutely bloody upheaved when we got here to find out that this country is not in fact Peter Pan’s hood. That’s the only reason the Battlers came to the Netherlands.

HAHA! Who are we kidding. We obviously came to Amsterdam for one thing. The reason everyone wants to visit Amsterdam. And that’s to see Anne Frank’s house.
Two Aussie blokes we met in Berlin, Dan and Jimmy, went to Anne’s house to visit her but she wasn’t home. The Battlers reckon it’s because they just popped in and didn’t call to make sure she was home. We didn’t even bother going to try and see her, mainly because it could have been awkward if neither of us had anything in common with her considering we’d never met her before.

Being told about the amount of pushies being ridden around the city, we thought this was a bit of a pisstake until we witnessed it. In Australia, all we have to worry about when crossing the street is cars, trucks, motorbikes, buses and taxis. Getting to Europe, thrown into the equation was trams and looking the opposite sides of the road first before crossing. Took us a while but we finally got the hang of it. Then we got here. A whole new type of ball game. Pushies. So from only having to worry about cars when crossing the road at home, now we have to look out for cars, trams and pushies. It’s much more difficult than it sounds.

Wom and I stayed in Bulldog Hostel, located on the brink of the ‘Red Light District’. Upon arrival, our first impressions of Amsterdam were that it was like living in what we can only imagine what a porno would be like, except with loads of drugs. Yep, everywhere you go you smell weed. Almost don’t have to buy the stuff as you could get high by just breathing. Next door to our hostel was the Bulldog Coffeeshop, your local for buying magic mushroom truffles, ecstasy, joints and chocolate tasting muffins. Our first night was my first marijuana experience. I didn’t feel a thing so either I can’t smoke properly (a good thing obviously indicating I don’t smoke, which I don’t ever) or it was not effective because it was my first time which apparently happens.

Next day, walked around town a bit and decided to book our tickets to the south of France to Bordeaux. We are meeting Millie there and staying with her so decided to get that out of the way so we wouldn’t have to battle with it later.

Met Dan and Jimmy that arvo in our hostel bar, had a few beers and I tried again. I’ve never bought drugs before so it probably wasn’t as much of a big deal for me as it may for others, but regardless, going into a shop and buying what we’ve always known as ‘illicit drugs’ legally was real strange. Buying a chocolate tasting muffin was as casual as buying a loaf of bread from the corner shop. Couldn’t help but feel that what I was doing was so illegal. The funny thing is, that when I asked the guy at reception whether we were allowed to carry it around in the street – walking from the coffeeshop to the bar – I received a short laugh followed by his response “you will get in more trouble by the cops for drinking a beer in public than smoking a joint… You’re in Amsterdam.”

And that got me thinking. What the hell are the police doing here! Everything known to be illegal everywhere else in the world is legal here; prostitutes, drugs… Well that’s about it, but still two pretty majorly illegal things. Whether it was because I was cruising in the stratosphere instead of my usual troposphere, I couldn’t stop laughing at how stupid that was.

But by far the stupidest people in Amsterdam are the drug dealers who under their breath offer you drugs as you walk by, particularly on the nightly stroll around the Red Light District. Every time we were asked, it made me wonder as to whether or not they knew that drugs were legal here and you can buy them at your local. Surely they must know. It got to the stage that when we were approached by an eerie looking bloke murmuring a drug name to us we’d respond “nah mate sorry I’m all out, there’s a coffeeshop nearby though.” It all happened very quick so I doubt they heard the last bit of our response. Probably a good thing.

Went to a sex show that doesn’t need to be discussed as there would be a look of disgust on your face if only you knew. The Wizard and I visited the Heineken Brewery and learnt a thing or two about beer. Walked around Vondelpark and got some snaps in front of the I AMSTERDAM sign with two American girls, Elizabeth and Olivia, from Utah who are staying in our room. They ski with all my favourite skiers and know them all so I was particularly stoked about that. Also went to a ‘club’, although it’s a stretch to call it that, on Saturday night called ‘Paradiso’. Basically it was a teenage disco that sold beer, similar to that of ‘Bounce’ or ‘ID’ or ‘Flooded Speakers’ with too many underage kids. We were alerted of this upon entry to the df so left pretty immediately.

Pretty much we did the same thing everyday, every afternoon for three out of four days. ‘Visiting Anne Frank’s House’ is what it became to be known.

Somewhere down the line of my family tree, generations upon generations ago, I am related to some Norwegians. One of these relatives, Håkon, visited Sydney in 2010 which was the first time I’d met him. He is studying just south of Amsterdam, still in the Netherlands, and was flying to meet his family in Nice this weekend. He decided to come visit me in Amsterdam the night before his flight. It was only the second time I had met the guy but we chatted and hung out like we were old pals. The similarities were quite uncanny between us in terms of women, morals and ethics as well as just our general perception on life. Made me think about traveling to Oslo near him and his family for a bit to see what life there is like because by the sounds of it it’s pretty bloody sensational. He said he’d show me around so that would be a good introduction to the real life of a Norwegian.

For different but more than obvious reasons, I really enjoyed Amsterdam. Definitely on the list of places I’d love to return to. Apparently by January 1st, no tourists will be able to buy drugs over the counter. Mind you the amount of people who have said that the past few years and have been wrong is high so to speak so I doubt it’ll happen. It’s a major tourist destination for that reason in particular so they’d be stupid to get rid of it. It was a great experience and one that most definitely couldn’t be forgotten. Would have to add it to one of the best experiences I’ve had to date